CafeChatNoir

“This is idiotproof!”

Because you’re just tempting God to build a better idiot.

(this one inspired by ’s V-Day countdown…)

“By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you’ll become happy; if you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher.”
Socrates (469-399 B.C.)

http://www.coolquotes.com/

Set out to leave the first vapor trail in the blue-sky scenario.

Peter Gibbons: When you come in on Monday and you’re not feeling real well, does anyone ever say to you, “Sounds like someone has a case of the Mondays?”
Lawrence: Shit, no man. I believe you’d get your ass kicked saying something like that, man.

Office Space

And I said, I don’t care if they lay me off either, because I told, I told Bill that if they move my desk one more time, then, then I’m, I’m quitting, I’m going to quit. And, and I told Don too, because they’ve moved my desk four times already this year, and I used to be over by the window, and I could see the squirrels, and they were married, but then, they switched from the Swingline to the Boston stapler, but I kept my Swingline stapler because it didn’t bind up as much, and I kept the staples for the Swingline stapler and its not okay because if they take my stapler then I’ll set the building on fire.

Milton Waddams, Office Space

If you can keep your head when all around you have lost theirs, then you probably haven’t understood the seriousness of the situation.

Now I am really starting to think that it *wasn’t* a compliment when someone told me the other day, “Wow, you’re the only one around here that is just totally keeping their cool.” Apparently, that is because I am clueless…

There’s no ‘I’ in ‘team’. But then there’s no ‘I’ in ‘useless smug colleague’, either. And there’s four in ‘platitude-quoting idiot’. Go figure.

And, again, no ‘I’ in ‘team’, but there is ME, so get the hell out of my way