Sleep Deprivation 101
1. Stay awake very late so that your prisoners are up as well. Get them sufficiently wound up that they cannot possibly sleep for at least another 2 hours after you go to bed.
2. Have the thermostat turned way down and provide blankets that aren’t warm enough. Sleeping while cold is exceptionally difficult if it’s not cold enough to induce death by freezing.
3. Lull the prisoners into a false sense of quiet by having the radio in the other room at a reasonable level. Even turn it off after a while. Then turn it up to the threshold of pain in the middle of the night for fun.
4. When you do get up, be sure to make as much noise as possible!
5. Have blackout shades in the prisoner’s room so that they have no sense of time and will not wake when the sun comes up. That way you can call the neighbors and gossip about how they’re “still not up yet” and act like you’ve been up for several hours when in fact you’ve only been up for an hour.
Just some handy tips for the next time you want visitors in your house to be running on 3 hours of sleep a night. Trust me, it works!