I’ll go out there for a couple days afterwards.  I can do Christmas or her birthday, but not both anymore.  (Lord knows I didn’t manage it with any grace or dignity up until now anyway.)  The stress isn’t even remotely worth it, and she’s to a point where she doesn’t know if we’re there, and on the off chance that she does, she has no idea how long we’ve been there, and certainly doesn’t know what day it is and whether or not we’re there on Christmas or if I’m just there myself a couple days later.  (Nevermind the fact that it costs near 3x as much for both of us to go out there for 8 days vs me there by myself for 4 days.)

I have to say, my attitude towards the holidays has improved immensely since making the decision.

Total Time = 40m 38s
Overall Rank = 1081/1247
Age Group = F 35-39
Age Group Rank = 61/72
Lap Paces:
1 – 12:26
2 – 12:25
3 – 14:27
.1- 10:49

Pre-race routine:

Got up, got dressed, drove there. Stopped for a latte. :) Coming off bashed foot and weekend plague, happy to be conscious.

Event warmup:

Just under 2 weeks ago, bashed the daylights out of my left foot. Much to my delight, the pain disappeared on Thursday. Just in time for me to be sick for the rest of the weekend.

Got my number, went back to the car to change into my running shoes, put on left shoe and….Owww. Why does that hurt? It shouldn’t hurt. IT WAS FINE THIS MORNING. Gingerly walked over to the warmup area and did a couple test jogs – apparently when I run I don’t push off with my two outer left toes, so all was well. Or I was favoring it and would end up with a twisted knee and a torqued hip, but whatever.

Passed on the group warmup being lead by a very enthusiastic gentleman and couldn’t help but look around and think, “You know, a bloody mary bar would be a perfect addition to this race…”

Had a bit of a sinking feeling at the race start as it was so humid that I was sweating even though we weren’t even moving yet.

Run Comments:

Given the circumstances, I had set my run/walk intervals at 1:30/2:30. Enough walking to deal with the fact that I’ve been out of the saddle for a while and enough running to keep me from being my usual idiot self and pushing too hard and blowing up. Plan your race, race your plan.

1st mile went very well. Stuck to the intervals with no problems, felt great when we hit the mile marker and listened to the voice in my head screaming “RACE YOUR PLAN!” as I went into mile 2.

Mile 2 went just as well, but I could feel myself getting heated up. The temps were coming up, the humidity didn’t seem to be going down and there was no breeze. The water station isn’t until just before the end of the second mile – a little too late for me. Not because I was thirsty – but because I was just too hot. Two cups, two sips and the rest went over my head and down my shirt. Un-sexiest wet t-shirt contest ever. Between this and the snot rockets, if there isn’t a rash of Missed Connections for #483, I am giving up on men in this town once and for all.

3rd mile was where the wheels came off. Overheated AND the sun came out! When the run intervals came around, just concentrated on short strides and quick turnover and thanked the heavens for the walk intervals. Really wished more people had put out sprinklers. Took my time going through the two that were on in that last mile.

Finally hit the turn to go to the finish. Love that turn. Nice and flat and then downhill. Somehow managed to pick up the pace in the last run interval – I think it’s easier when you know you can just fall over at the end.

What would you do differently?:

Not bashed my foot or been sick so I could have gotten some training in over the past 2 weeks. If I could have made the humidity lower, I would have done that, too.

Warm down:

My usual at this race – get bottle of water and dump ice down my shirt.

What limited your ability to perform faster:

Coming off being sick, the humidity, and oh, yes, the fact that I am utterly out of shape.

The first year we went to PHX for Christmas was 2007, and we didn’t really make any other holiday plans – BAD idea, but we had no idea WTF we were doing, either.  After that, I decided the house would get decorated to some extent, and we would have our own little Christmas with brunch and presents and mimosas – because Christmas in PHX tends to just be another day in the desert.

So, we picked a day to be Christmas upon our return, and it is TOMORROW!!!  There are presents under the tree.  I am still extorting good behaviour out of the pets with the phrase, “Santa Claus is watching!!”  And I cannot wait to see how my little brother likes what Santa brought him.  (As well as the gifts  procured by the pets.  I have no idea how they got hold of my credit card and Amazon.com password.)

But at the moment, I am looking over at the Christmas tree and it would certainly seem that Santa has had a small sleigh accident here. :-D

TOMORROW IS CHRISTMAS!!!!!!!!

First, it’s 70 degrees. Don’t get me wrong – it’s GREAT. But we haven’t had weather this nice any other year we’ve been here, so it’s odd. (This is year 4 out here for the holidays…)

Got to the care center today and grandma was in a lovely mood, up and ready for lunch and absolutely zero recognition of who we were. (And it didn’t seem to bother her one bit, and we weren’t going to cause problems.) But, we had a nice lunch and she liked her presents, so it’s all good. Classic moment: After lunch, we’re sitting in her room chatting, and she rolls herself out the door and says, “OK, well, turn the lights off when you leave!” We took that as our cue that she was done with visitors for the day. :)

There is a football game starting in about an hour and a half right next door. This is great because all the restaurants at Westgate are open this evening. If you lived in the area, I can see how a Christmas evening football game could be fun – and others must agree since the parking lots are filled with tailgaters. However, the hotel is also filled with football fans and I can’t say I can really wrap my head around traveling at Christmas for a sporting event. Hell, I’m not even thrilled with traveling at Christmas for Christmas itself, so this is really lost on me.

It’s just been a really, really odd day.

Popped over to the care center today to see Grandma – caught her after lunch and just before her afternoon snooze so we sat and chatted and watched some TV. Her room setup is perfect. The bed is on the one side, and then she’s got her two chairs and end table on one side, some of her pictures from home and such – it’s not “home” but it’s very cozy and nice and doesn’t feel like an institution. She’s kind of out in left field, and there is some occasional aphasia when she’s talking, but she sure as hell knew Donald was there when he said hello.

Overall she’s in good spirits, and frankly, the meds they’ve given her to keep her from being all wound up are working very well – she was in a perfectly pleasant mood. However, she did ask Donald, “I know I really shouldn’t be worrying about these things, but am I going to die here?” (I was out of the room and missed this gem.) Apparently it was said with about the level of curiosity and concern as if she’d asked, “Are we having pizza tonight?” Donald fielded it with something along the lines of “Since you don’t know when you’ll die, there’s no real way to know *where* you’ll die.” and she found that perfectly acceptable.

Went and got her Christmas goodies. (Yay for her finally just saying, “Oh, candy would be wonderful for Christmas!” and having people around who can read the labels and help her open them!) Hit the Dollar Tree for a gift bag and tissue paper – SO much better than the dollar stores back east. They have actual brand name items, rather than anti-freeze laden toothpaste called “Coldgate”. And a whole damn aisle of Willy Wonka candy. My brother & I may have gotten ourselves a few goodies. (As Donald said, “We’ll be lucky if we don’t end up in a diabetic coma before the week is up.”)

Thanks to the Arizona/Dallas game, the hotel restaurant will be open from 6AM to 10PM tomorrow – very nice considering that a) little if anything else will be open tomorrow, and Christmas Dinner at the care center is actually Christmas Lunch, and though I am sure it will be very good, I think we’ll probably be a touch hungry once the evening rolls around.

So, we’re off to a good start I think.

Trust me, there are much worse things than being single on Valentine’s Day.  Being with someone who spends the entire day complaining that society forced them to buy you flowers ain’t that great.

If you’ve got someone, have a great day doing sweet things for them.  If you’re on your own, go do some sweet things for yourself and enjoy the day anyway.  Sit yourself down and watch some Olympic biathlon – cause nothing says love and romance and happy days like skis, guns and a sport that started a World War.

And consider yourself smooched.

She actually decided that eating in was preferable to standing in line for over an hour for the exact same food.  However, we did near come to blows over the microwave…  She doesn’t use it, and has decided it is broken, which must be why she doesn’t use it.  No, she doesn’t use it because she can’t even begin to read any of the buttons and can’t remember what order to hit them in.*  Then even if it did work, she was sure I wouldn’t know how to use it, because it’s not the same model as mine.

But, we finally got past all that and had a relatively pleasant dinner.

The Snuggie seemed to be a hit, (yes, we got her a Snuggie, no I am not proud of it) though I wish I had remembered how damn big those things are (it’s pretty obvious from the ads that they’re huge) and had I been smart I would have opened it up before we left and hemmed it up, but hindsight is always 20/20, isn’t it?

Despite feeling like death, and it greatly affecting my mood to the negative side, I am happy to say there have been no knock down-drag out fights yet, and even today when she was getting a touch on the bitchy side, I did not take the bait.

*Thankfully others bring her home cooked stuff so it’s not like she lives 100% on cold food.  But would certainly do so if left to her own devices.

I made an executive decision this year, and it was that we would NOT be going to JB’s for Christmas dinner.  It is a perfectly fine place, but it is the only place that is open on Christmas day in Sun City, and as such, it is a madhouse.  Unless you get there the minute they open for the morning brunch, you can count on a minimum of a 1 hour wait.  There are not enough places to sit when waiting, and given that it is Sun City, about 2/3 of the guests NEED to sit while waiting.  Finally, it is a buffet, which is near impossible for my grandmother to navigate with the cane & balance issues.

Yet, she has made noises about doing it again this year.  (I suspect she has forgotten the buffet/insane asylum aspect of it.)  Rather than even argue it, we are just going to surprise her.

With the help of Safeway’s deli & prepared foods department, we’re heading over with turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, gravy, pasta salad and rolls.  Everything we could get at JB’s without the wait or standing in line to get it, and without the noise and insanity of being stuffed in a small restaurant with 120 other people.  (I also fully admit this may be nothing more subconscious revenge for the year she arrived and simply announced we would be having ham for Christmas dinner and that was that.  I beleive that was also the year I banned her from my kitchen.)

This one really could go either way.

Of course, now I am just using the laptop because my god, no offense to my grandmother, it is so incredibly boring here, cause we don’t talk about anything besides her checkbook, taxes, or death.  And I can certainly talk about her checkbook and surf the internet all at the same time – I am quite the multitasker.  I also need to keep track of where Santa is, dammit.  I think keeping my sanity intact is very important, lest I start saying what I’m thinking out loud.

Today’s conversations have been split between the checkbook and the fact that our presence has thrown her day into disarray.  Her nose is also out of joint because Sharyn isn’t coming over today.  Sharyn isn’t coming over because a) we are here and can help out and b) Sharyn’s grandchildren are here and she wants to spend time with them.  Though given that Sharyn is the only thing keeping her out of a nursing home, it’s a good thing she likes her.

We made it.  Grandma is still grandma, if flakier and more frail.  Nothing unexpected – she’ll be 87 in a week and has never had a healthy habit in her life.  The fact that she is still alive is amazing, though I would have to say that one good fall with a broken bone, and she’d be toast.  In talking w/Sharyn it’s agreed all around that the “caregiving crew that can’t be called caregivers” needs to be expanded and we’ll be working on that.  The biggest problem is when she is alone, no one gets any peace.  Whenever something pops into her head, she goes to the phone – it’s a pure reflex at this point for her, not a conscious decision, which results in her making everyone else crazy.

This is probably also the last Christmas she’ll have any clue who we are.  Kinda sad, but again, hardly unexpected.  I’d say it could be her last Christmas here on earth, but we’ve been saying that for the last 10 years.

The calendar says it’s Christmas Eve, but you couldn’t prove it by me – the biggest downer of being here at Christmas is that it has never, ever felt anything like Christmas.  Everything that makes Christmas what it is to me is back home, not here.  So, that part fairly well sucks, but it is what it is.  (And though I have fears to the contrary, my grandmother will not live forever and I’ll have many years of finally doing Christmas my way.  Just not this year.)

On the upside, we have made a few brilliant decisions this trip.  The first being the hotel.  (Mad props to my brother for coming up with this idea in the first place.)  We’re at the Renaissance Grand over in Glendale, and it’s really nice.  It’s right next to the town center which has a bucketload of restaurants, the hockey arena and a movie theater – and people under the age of 60.  And given that it doesn’t seem that Phoenix is a big Christmas destination, we got a really good deal on the room to boot.

The second brilliant decision was in making the travel days separate from any interaction with my grandmother.  (This comes from my last trip out here.)  It may sound harsh, but I can deal with US Airways, or my grandmother, but not both in the same day.  Just isn’t going to work.

Last but not least – deciding to fly out of Dulles instead of National.  Amazing how when you decide you will take flights that are convienent for YOU and not anyone else, things are a lot easier.  I hadn’t flown out of Dulles in 10 years and I was blown away at how much better it is than National.  Between having many hours in the morning to get the pets to the kennel (*sob*) and not having to take a death cab to the metro and fight with that ridiculousness (and I’m not even sure our metro station was open) and deal with the service impaired folks at National – it was actually a stress free travel day.

I’m still kicking myself a bit for the length of this trip – we could probably leave day after tomorrow and it wouldn’t make a difference at all in my grandmother’s mind.  But her shrieks of “you won’t be here long enough to get everything done!” from years past kept ringing in my ears as I made the reservations…  Ah well, lessons learned.  (I think I’ll have it all figured out about a week after she dies.  If she ever dies.)