So, I sit here feeling like someone has taken a sledgehammer to the side of my face. Yes, I’ve just returned from my new (and soon to be former) dentist.
My old dentist moved to Leesburg. There were two other dentists in the practice - I asked to see Dr H, and got stuck w/ Dr J. Should have just insisted on seeing Dr H…
I don’t like having to have the “gun talk” with prospective dentists, but it would seem that I am going to have to start it.
“So, what did you do this weekend?”
“Well, Doc, I went to the firing range, shot off about 300 or so rounds, and achieved my NRA pro-marksman certification. Now, this whole dental appointment is going to be as comfortable as possible, correct?” (The pro-marksman thing is actually true.)
So, for any potential dentists out there, here is a list of things to think about…
- When I state, “I have my music turned up too loud to even hear you, I will just let you know if there is a problem”, DO NOT kill the nitrous buzz every 5 minutes to ask if I am OK. I TOLD you I would let you know and I really did mean it.
- Do not attempt to administer the novacaine while I am still sitting up. The sight of you coming straight at me with the needle from hell does not help with relaxation, and sets me back quite a bit. Which results in you having to leave the room for another 10 minutes while I calm down again. Turn up the nitrous, and tip the chair over *before* you give the injection so I don’t see the stinking needle.
- Do not kill the nitrous buzz just to let me know that “We’re starting to put the fillings in now”, and other equally unimportant things. I really don’t give a rat’s ass what you’re doing, except that I *was* relaxed, and now I am not, which means that now I am not relaxed AND I am pissed off. If the building is not on fire, there is no need to attempt to speak to me.
- I have indicated multiple times that I am EXTREMELY uncomfortable (ok, completely phobic) about dentists and dentistry. However, I still try very hard to stay calm. Please don’t interpret that as “totally comfortable with the experience”, it is called “acting”. (I will still let you know if it hurts)
- Do not blame the equipment. The fact that you didn’t give me enough novacaine is why it hurt when you were drilling. (Especially after I informed you of an unfortunate trait I have of burning through novacaine very quickly and asked you to refer to my file for previous dosage information.) The claim of the drill being “off pitch” is all fine and well, but don’t tell me it’s something you’re “attuned” to, because you should have noticed it was “off pitch” when you started it up.
- Do not blame the equipment #2. When you’re picking at the filling and I say “OW”, do not blame the ‘bands’ that you put in my mouth. When I tell you that, no, it hurts **where you’re picking at it**, don’t blame the bands again (and be real: don’t call them “bands”, you put freaking thumbscrews on my jaw, I could see that much.)
In a nutshell:
- Crank up the nitrous
- Don’t let me see the needle
- Don’t talk to me unless it is REALLY important - and I mean REALLY, REALLY important
- Just because I “look” calm, doesn’t mean I am not terrified
- Just because I am terrified, doesn’t mean I am in pain
- I really, really will tell you if there is a problem.
I really hate going to the dentist…
